These words are those I use to shape my identity. It's natural to need and want labels. Those are mine. Among others, but the big picture of me starts with those few words. And what's so wonderful about identity is that those identifiers mean something unique to me. If there was another woman out there that uses those exact same words, even she would have different understanding and perspective of her identity. What's funny is with the obvious exception of the white part and the 30 year old part (although age plays an important role), in my perspective I consider myself a minority.
There are no truths there are only perceptions.
I went to elementary school in Ohio. I had to learn their state song and motto. At an assembly when we sang 50 Nifty United States, the last line we were told to shout with pride, "Ohio is the best state of them all!" I asked if I could say Kentucky. My teacher said I could quietly add it after I shouted Ohio. One of my dear friends from this school still talks about Kentucky like it's the Old West. Foreign, unfamiliar, and unexplored. I live .72 miles from the state line. And as an adult I choose to live here, especially now that we have indoor plumbing.
Living in Cincinnati it's not rare to find Christians. And by Christians I mean Catholics, specifically. Identifying with the bastard faith of its Roman predecessor has prevented me from taking communion at friend's weddings. That's not true, because I always go to the altar and share in the sacrament that I was invited to. I've been to weddings where a priest has WORD FOR WORD SAID, "So if you aren't Catholic just stay in your pew, it's fine! Know that we still pray for you, but the altar is saved for those actively practicing Catholic Faith". I think that exactly what Jesus said. You know, since he was Jewish. I choose to believe in one God and I choose to believe in a God who doesn't care where you are when you pray. I choose to believe that He forgives ALL sinners if not the sin. Which is why I am able to forgive that elitist priest for trying to tell me that God does not offer his grace to me directly but that my Catholic friends will pray for me.
And when I find myself outside a community of faith, I most often find myself in a community of young people. Not super weird as I'm one, too. But in 2012 many people my age identify themselves as Agnostic or Atheist. I find this to be especially true in an urban setting. Even more true within an artists community. You should see some of the looks I get when I explain that I not only believe in God but that I teach Sunday School. Why is it that you can't like beer or sex to be a good Christian? I mean, you know that Tammy Faye Baker loved sinning. But more frustratingly, why do I have to defend myself because your perception of Christianity is shaped by media, tea parties, movies, and teen age rebellion? Yes I believe in evolution. Yes I believe in Gay marriage. Yes I believe in pre-marital sex (just kidding Dad). I don't really know what I think about heaven and no I don't believe that Jesus Christ is our Lord and Savior. But I do think he was a good man and I choose to use his story as a model for how I hope to live with an open heart and mind. I try to feed the hungry and help the needy and sick. I know that the word Christian isn't very sexy these days, and I don't care what faith, if any, you choose to identify with. Just be fucking nice.
And as few Christians there are in my communities, there are still fewer Republicans. Yes I live in a Red state. And yes it will be the first state to be called Red in the election. But sort of like how the coasts are predominantly blue, so are urban cores. And my generation is very blue. During the 2008 election friends were talking about me like I had leprosy. Seriously I went out to celebrate President Obama's election (no I didn't vote for him, but it was history and I love good party. And like it or not, he was going to be my President and I wanted to welcome him properly) and a friend, not a close friend but more than an acquaintance, came running into the Pub cheering, high fiving, and hugging people. She stopped at me and said, "I heard you're a Republican". Seriously?!?!?! From whom? And how does that even come into conversation unless you were talking poorly of me? Yes I believe in a choice for marriage and adoption rights for same sex couples. Yes I believe in a woman's choice no matter what circumstance led her to this point. But I do not believe that these are political issues. I believe these are human issues.
Unfortunately it's not like that and government has put their nose where they don't belong. So please don't confuse my desire for small government, educational benchmarks, local funding for community progress, privatized health care, strong and continued military defense, as a lack of compassion. Because I don't believe that a MAN from California should not get to vote to tell me what my choices are. And I don't believe that anyone knows how I or my children learn and the presumption that two people learn in the exact same way is absurd. And I most definitely do not believe that I should be paying twice the deductible as my male counterpart in the off chance that I get pregnant. So by confusing my values, beliefs, and character with my preferred governmental strategy to running this country is, at best, unfair.
I'm tired of living in a world where the terms 'liberal' and 'conservative' have become no different than other words that negatively generalize an entire group of people. Liberal does not mean young and hip nor does conservative does mean red neck. And to my Republican friends, liberal does not mean uninformed nor un-American. Stop generalizing. Be fucking nice.
This country was greatly and eloquently founded on the principles of "Life, Liberty, and the Pursuit of Happiness". Of course at the time that was written mostly with the happiness of white men in mind, but to me, I see that as a choice for life, a choice for liberty, and a choice for a path to happiness. An unalienable freedom of choice. My choice and your choice. And if we keep that phrase as simple as was intended to be, it can easily adapt to the needs of the American people today and 200 years from now.
But our system is broken and politicians are insisting they know what my idea of happiness is. Over-complicating a very simple premise. So while everyone insists that Obama's better or Romney's better or Willard Fucking Fillmore should come back, I promise to not get in the way of others pursuit and I promise to keep learning and questioning and challenging injustices. There is no one candidate with whom I perfectly identify with as a 31 year old, white, Episcopal, Republican, woman from Covington, KY. How could there be? So in the mean time I vote as honestly as I can for my opportunity to pursue a life where I can thrive. And in the mean time I write letters to my congress about injustices I find, I pray for peace (yes pray), and I offer kindness and compassion and care to all those I am able.
I hope you choose the same.
May was all get back to a hopeful land mindful of the fact that, as the lovely Avett Brothers say, "nothing is owed, deserved, or expected and your life doesn't change by the man that's elected, when you're loved by someone you're never rejected. Decide what to be and go be it" Pursue a life that makes you happy by the choices you make daily. And don't tell me what makes me happy. You'll never truly know.
I'm still trying to work that out for myself.
Until then, I am AMAZED by the security and safety I am offered daily to make mistakes in life in this great land. And I'm especially thankful for dialogue with those who allow for it. No matter which side of an argument you stand on thanks for sharing your perspective and listening to mine.
Speaking of which...read this:
http://thishoodlife.com/2012/09/25/the-value-of-seeing-in-p-c-matt-werbach/
And take a look at my mother's brief perspective:
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